Does this mean I'm a Grown-up?

My Evil Plan...REALIZED!!

Yes friends, my evil plan has come to fruition. (Que evil laugh) Mu Ha Ha.

You see, my friends and family have called me a "gourmet" and a "chef" for years. Really all that means is that I love to cook. Honestly, I'm just really good at following recipes. Chefs create...I copy. I make at least 3 or 4 new recipes every week. I'm not original, but the eats are still pretty good around here.

That being said, the family naturally has Thanksgiving dinner here at our house. We have the most room, and I love to cook. Some years we have a large number of attendees, other years the dinners are smaller. One fact remains the same....

*ahem* *cough, cough*

I have a confession to make.

I have NEVER cleaned a turkey for Thanksgiving. NEVER.

You see, I honestly think the whole idea is pretty disgusting. I have a major poultry issue. Seriously, I can't even eat chicken on the bone. And the thought of actually sticking my hand in a raw slimy bird to remove/clean/ANYTHING is positively revolting to me. At Thanksgiving I get around it by "allowing" my Mother and/or my Mother-In-Law to take control of the kitchen for the 15 minutes that preparing the bird requires. This tactic has worked for years.

Last year I began to detect a flaw in the system. What would happen if (God forbid) my Mother or my Mother-In-Law were not around???!?! Fortunately for me, the answer revealed itself this year. Amazingly enough, both teens showed interest in preparing the meal this year. #1 Son helped me from start to finish with every dish. When it came time to prepare the bird (this year we opted for 2 turkey breasts, as we had a much smaller crowd), both kids actually *asked* to help!

How great was it for ME that my Mother showed the kids how to clean the birds?!??!?!

HALLELUJAH! #1 Son actually made the comment, "so I suppose I'm going to have to do this for the rest of YOUR life??"

Well...DUH.

Eeeeewwwwww!

I Remember

It was 1976. I was in sixth grade.

I remember that Mr. Hunt, my teacher, wore the most horrendous (to me now) powder blue leisure suit and red print shirt in our class picture.

I remember feeling sad when Ford lost and Carter won, because my father seemed defeated. I didn't know why.

I remember gas lines, when you could only buy 10 gallons on certain days - if your license plate ended in an even number, you bought gas on that day, odd numbers, the other days. All that goes through my mind tonight is PERSONALIZED tags. I have them - there is NO odd or even?!!! When will I get to buy gas?

Our new President is a Socialist. Lord help me, because I remember.

I remember interest rates - a concept that was as foreign to me back then as nuclear physics. I remember the rates for buying a home going to 12% and higher - the prime interest rate went above 17%.

Tonight, I understand my parents' concern.

There's only so much damage that a socialist President and a Democratic Congress can do.

I pray that my family can financially survive it.