Tuesday, October 17, 2006

The Sneaky Gene

I've always known they were sneaky. Tonight The Princess of Wails (The Artist Formerly Known As The Little One, aka. The Middle Child because she has developed a rather humorous case of "Jan Brady Syndrome.") almost pulled one over on me. Either she is getting better, or I am inching closer to "the home."

You see, #1 Son is selling candy as a fund-raiser for his Crew team. His sister is an easy mark, as she covets candy. Tonight, in lieu of the usual mixed temptation box he usually has, #1 Son brought home a box containing nothing but Reese's Cups. Reese's Cups are one of The Princess' favorite poisons. As you might recall from a previous post, I am a bit fond of the chocolate and peanut-butter treats myself. (Ahem)

Obviously #1 Son has a knack for marketing.

Anyhoo, The Girl buys a Reese's Cup package from her brother. This angered me, as dinner was soon to hit the table. Being the excellent Mother that I am, I threatened to inflict bodily harm on her if she ate the candy before dinner. She kept laughing and saying, "Do you want me to show it to you? I haven't eaten it! You can trust me, Mom!" Of course, being the excellent AND trusting Mother that I am, I kept demanding proof. The kid provided it on demand, in the form of the unopened candy wrapper. I was actually rather happy with her.

My bubble burst after dinner when I helped #1 Son count his money and account for all the candy. It seems that The Princess used some of her birthday money to purchase not ONE, but FIVE packages of candy from her brother. She was eating them throughout the evening, while saving one unopened candy to show me each time she was challenged.

What a little Butthead.

I had no choice but to admit defeat this time around. I'm not happy about it.

Obviously the Sneaky Gene comes from her father's side of the family.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Open Letter to Motorists...

...Driving East on Interstate 64 in the Morning:

Dear Idiot:

Repeat after me, "The big burning ball will not hurt me." Repeat it again. And again. You see my driving impaired friend, the "big burning ball" is nothing but the sun. It appears every morning in the same place. If we do not have rain, the "big burning ball" will always be there. You've probably been driving this same route for ages. This is not a news flash.

The "big burning ball" is a zillion miles away from Interstate 64. It will not hurt you. Trust me. I understand that it startles you as you round a corner or crest a small hill. Please believe me when I tell you that there is NO NEED to slam on your brakes. You do not need to screech to a complete halt.

You see, the simple act of slamming on your brakes eventually causes a chain reaction that slows and backs up traffic for miles. This makes your fellow drivers a little testy. We live in a military area. How many of your fellow drivers are licensed to carry a weapon? I'm just saying you might want to think about it.

Perhaps you will want to be proactive in the future. Here's a clue: things like SUNshades and SUNglasses might be helpful to you. You drive this route everyday. Surely you can formulate a gameplan to counteract the "big burning ball?" Do it for your own safety.

I'm just sayin'.

Name: Cattiva
Location: Virginia, United States

About Me: I'm the mom of three: #1 Son (20), The Princess of Wails (17) and their baby brother - The Baby (6). I was a grad-student working on an MA in history until we were surprised - I mean blessed - with The Baby. I'll get back to it...someday (the thesis, not the kid - I have no choice concerning the kid). I am one of only a few people I went to school with who is actually using their history degree in my career (and to think my Father called it Basket-weaving!). I live a very hectic life amongst massive clutter. I call it a good day if we have managed to get home at night without losing one of the kids (no matter how hard I try!). Friends say I have a humorous take on life's happenings. The sad part is that what I write about is true. I laugh to keep from crying.

See my complete profile

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