Mommy the Martyr

It is a mother's natural instinct to play the martyr and I was trained by a professional. My mother rose to the rank of General in the Martyr brigade early on. She had us believe that she gave up everything for us and kept nothing for herself. For our greed we received a deep sigh followed by "It's OK. I do without so that you can have. I love you." Who was she kidding? I distinctly remember finding several of her "hidden" stashes as a kid.

In the years that have followed, the notes I took from those incidents have served me well. You would think that Mom would be darned proud. Imagine my surprise when she was over here recently and discovered my stash of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups hidden in an empty frozen veggie bag in the freezer.

Her: What on EARTH are these doing in here?
Me: Mom, I have to hide them or the kids will get them.
Her: Oh for heaven’s sake! The kids LOVE these.
Me: That's my point. They're sneaky little buggers and that's my third hiding place this month!
Her: Well they deserve them. I just can't understand why you would hide candy from the babies! (Ed. Note. You'll remember the "babies" are 10 and 13 years old)
Her: Kids, come down here right now!
Me: But MOM those were mine!
Her: (ignoring my plea) Look what NaNa has for you!
Kids: Cool! NaNa bought us candy!
Her: Well, you've both been working so hard. You deserve them.
Kids: NaNa you're the BEST!

That old bat owes me a jumbo bag of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.


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