Monday, May 08, 2006

Rainy Days and Mondays

Babies who wake up screaming at 4:00am are a harbinger of the rest of your day.

Said babies are far more cranky than usual.

The mother of a cranky baby gets incredibly crabby herself.

Dogs with small bladders and even smaller brains are afraid of the rain.

Dogs who are afraid of the rain will attempt to hold it for approximately 1 hour and 47 minutes.

The pouring rain will last for 1 hour and 53 minutes. You do the math. Be sure to factor in the only carpet in the entire house. Which was just cleaned.

The number of times your over-excitable soccer Mom friend will call you in the morning (every half an hour until you answer the phone) is exponential to the number of hours of sleep you lost the previous night.

Multiply that number by 2 if the baby is finally napping with you.

Multiply that number again by 2 if your daughter has left her telephone handset with the incredibly obnoxious ring in your room.

It is a safe bet that when you resemble a sleep deprived zombie with the corresponding attention span of a gnat, you will not get a shower.

Children who waltz in from school with all the subtlety of a Mardi-Gras parade, thus waking the baby you have been desperately trying to get to take an afternoon nap and announce, "what's your problem?" risk imminent death. was your day?


Post a Comment

<< Home

Name: Cattiva
Location: Virginia, United States

About Me: I'm the mom of three: #1 Son (20), The Princess of Wails (17) and their baby brother - The Baby (6). I was a grad-student working on an MA in history until we were surprised - I mean blessed - with The Baby. I'll get back to it...someday (the thesis, not the kid - I have no choice concerning the kid). I am one of only a few people I went to school with who is actually using their history degree in my career (and to think my Father called it Basket-weaving!). I live a very hectic life amongst massive clutter. I call it a good day if we have managed to get home at night without losing one of the kids (no matter how hard I try!). Friends say I have a humorous take on life's happenings. The sad part is that what I write about is true. I laugh to keep from crying.

See my complete profile

Best of Blogs 


 Subscribe in a reader

This Day in History

eXTReMe Tracker