You Were Wrong!
HA! I bet you thought they had killed me didn't you? Well they tried my friends. They really tried, but I prevailed to witness yet another glorious "First Day of School." I swear, there is nothing quite as satisfying as waking the rotten fruit of one's loins at the crack of dawn on the "First Day of School," especially if they have been at each other's throats and driving you into shock therapy all summer. Perhaps I overdid it a bit by playing the Hallelujah Chorus from Handel's Messiah as their wake-up call on the stereo...
At full blast...
On repeat.
You would have thought I committed the faux pas of kissing them in public in full 80's garb by the nasty reception I received. Ingrates. They should be happy that I am so into their education. Some day they will thank me.
Despite the rude reception I was subjected to, nothing was going to ruin my favorite day of the year. You should have seen them scurrying around like little lost blind mice, bumping into walls and acting startled at the smallest noise. It was reminiscent of my reaction this summer to a ringing phone at 2:30am or a wrestling match on the stairs over the last Oreo. Honestly my friends, I haven't had this much fun since...well, since the "First Day of School" last year.
I can only describe my euphoria as the same feeling as discovering a huge molten chocolate fudge cake topped with numerous scoops of Ben and Jerry's Brownie Fudge and Half Baked ice cream, showered with dark chocolate chips and smothered with dark chocolate fudge, marshmallow cream and giant chunks of chocolate chip cookie dough...that magically provides a NEGATIVE calorie count, thus making it a diet food where you would actually lose weight and eventually shrink to a size 2.
Yeah. It's that good.
At full blast...
On repeat.
You would have thought I committed the faux pas of kissing them in public in full 80's garb by the nasty reception I received. Ingrates. They should be happy that I am so into their education. Some day they will thank me.
Despite the rude reception I was subjected to, nothing was going to ruin my favorite day of the year. You should have seen them scurrying around like little lost blind mice, bumping into walls and acting startled at the smallest noise. It was reminiscent of my reaction this summer to a ringing phone at 2:30am or a wrestling match on the stairs over the last Oreo. Honestly my friends, I haven't had this much fun since...well, since the "First Day of School" last year.
I can only describe my euphoria as the same feeling as discovering a huge molten chocolate fudge cake topped with numerous scoops of Ben and Jerry's Brownie Fudge and Half Baked ice cream, showered with dark chocolate chips and smothered with dark chocolate fudge, marshmallow cream and giant chunks of chocolate chip cookie dough...that magically provides a NEGATIVE calorie count, thus making it a diet food where you would actually lose weight and eventually shrink to a size 2.
Yeah. It's that good.
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