The Law

Day 4 of Summer Vacation and it has already gotten ugly. I am determined that this summer is going to be different. We will have peace and harmony, along with a clean house if it kills them. As I was doing the laundry today, I was inspired to institute some rules in writing, as my beloved family has obviously forgotten them in the excitement of summer break. Behold the latest edict:

Yes, that is a picture of the actual list posted on the door to our garage/laundry room. It reads as follows:

ATTENTION FAMILY!

It has come to my attention that you all still believe in the laundry fairy. SHE DOES NOT EXIST! She and the Tooth Fairy took off for Las Vegas several years ago. As of today, June 19, 2006, we will begin reinforcing the valuable lesson of taking care of our belongings. Penalties will now be assessed for various infractions as follows:

Smelly socks that have to be turned right-side = 1 hour NO electronics PER sock

Dirty socks found anywhere but the hamper or laundry = 1 hour NO electronics PER sock

Shoes found anywhere but on your feet or in your room = 1 DAY NO electronics

Clothing found in the dirty laundry that you have not worn = 1 DAY NO electronics

Clean folded clothing that does NOT make it to your drawers (and instead ends up strewn on the floor) = 1 WEEK NO electronics.

***Note – Electronics = television, computers, PS2, PSP, telephone, DVD, VCR, etc. This list is subject to change at any time.

The sign met with mixed reviews, as expected. The Princess of Wales declared that it was, "the stupidest list of rules ever." The Prince was OK with it, as he has been washing his own laundry for months and he thinks this is aimed at his sister. Won't he be surprised when the last rule costs him serious computer time? C., of course, applauded the posting.

I have already decided to modify the sign. I need to add:

Any items found in the pockets of laundry will immediately become thepossessionn of The Management. This is regardless of the form of the item. The Management could care less if it is money or your "favorite" pen or rock.

and

Clothing for inanimate objects (such as stuffed animals) does not get dirty or worn. Each item of stuffed animal clothes = 1 DAY NO electronics.

(PS - Oh Lord Stanley, Lord Stanley! If the Pens should ever leave the Burgh, my heart will belong 2 hours south!) - And yes, I know that probably only Cuppojoe will get that.