My Advice to Web Searchers
For several weeks I have been keeping a list of some of the more amusing web searches that have somehow found this blog. It is obvious to me that these people have serious issues. How these searchers made their way here, I cannot begin to fathom. I guess I need to watch my big fat keyboard a bit more closely in the future.
nana punk bump toe shoes
Dear Nana: Anyone who cannot decide on a fetish needs professional help. I am sure you were disappointed when you did not find a picture of my 70-year-old pregnant mother wearing black ballet slippers. Better luck next time.
Big boobs milk
Dear Boobs: I am pretty sure there is a porn site for that. Sorry. This is not it.
If a child doesn't do well the first semester in college does that mean they are in trouble the entire time
Dear Parent: They are if it is MY kid. Take his car away, cut up his credit cards and fake ID and kick him in the butt.
Does your period mean you stop growing
Dear Sweet Child: No it does not. In fact you grow quite a bit, what with all the water gain and the cheetos cravings. It just SEEMS like you are bigger because for a couple of days people are afraid to be around you. This will pass.
What does it mean to watch your child fall out of a tree
Dear Parent: That depends. Did you push him?
what does twenty mean in math
Dear Rhoades Scholar: It comes after nineteen.
Pictures of Flashing assholes
Dear Misguided User: Did you mean flaming? Flashing sounds like a serious medical condition. Please hang up and dial 911.
When a daughter does not get along with her mother
Dear Parent: Duh. When DOES a daughter get along with her mother? Relax and enjoy the tornado that is a girl child.
Parents Nude in front of their teenager
Dear Parent: Grab a towel and answer the door. It’s Child Protective Services and they would like to have a word with you.
what does the name June mean?
Dear Child: I assume it means your mother hated the names May and July.
search for colleges that pay$89 per month as their school fee in usa
Dear Prospective Student: You are obviously from a foreign country. For your next search try "technical schools that advertise on matchbook covers."
what does killing someone in your dreams mean
Dear Dreamer: Get out of my head.
PS - Don't forget to vote in the BoB awards! You can vote once a day per valid email address.
nana punk bump toe shoes
Dear Nana: Anyone who cannot decide on a fetish needs professional help. I am sure you were disappointed when you did not find a picture of my 70-year-old pregnant mother wearing black ballet slippers. Better luck next time.
Big boobs milk
Dear Boobs: I am pretty sure there is a porn site for that. Sorry. This is not it.
If a child doesn't do well the first semester in college does that mean they are in trouble the entire time
Dear Parent: They are if it is MY kid. Take his car away, cut up his credit cards and fake ID and kick him in the butt.
Does your period mean you stop growing
Dear Sweet Child: No it does not. In fact you grow quite a bit, what with all the water gain and the cheetos cravings. It just SEEMS like you are bigger because for a couple of days people are afraid to be around you. This will pass.
What does it mean to watch your child fall out of a tree
Dear Parent: That depends. Did you push him?
what does twenty mean in math
Dear Rhoades Scholar: It comes after nineteen.
Pictures of Flashing assholes
Dear Misguided User: Did you mean flaming? Flashing sounds like a serious medical condition. Please hang up and dial 911.
When a daughter does not get along with her mother
Dear Parent: Duh. When DOES a daughter get along with her mother? Relax and enjoy the tornado that is a girl child.
Parents Nude in front of their teenager
Dear Parent: Grab a towel and answer the door. It’s Child Protective Services and they would like to have a word with you.
what does the name June mean?
Dear Child: I assume it means your mother hated the names May and July.
search for colleges that pay$89 per month as their school fee in usa
Dear Prospective Student: You are obviously from a foreign country. For your next search try "technical schools that advertise on matchbook covers."
what does killing someone in your dreams mean
Dear Dreamer: Get out of my head.
PS - Don't forget to vote in the BoB awards! You can vote once a day per valid email address.
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