Thursday, November 24, 2005

Can You Keep a Secret?

I love to cook. Seriously, I really do. Thus, I am somewhat ashamed to admit that in all these years I have never produced a Thanksgiving turkey all by my lonesome. Forgive me Martha Stewart for I have sinned.

We celebrate the holiday here at our house every year. I like it that way for a couple of reasons. First, my house actually gets cleaned. Well, the downstairs gets cleaned. OK OK, the downstairs crap gets hidden in the upstairs closets. Whatever, it at least looks better than usual. I guess the threat of company kicks my normally carefree family into high gear. Of course it could also be my hysterical screaming, but I digress.

The second reason I love having the holiday here is because the rest of the family feels sorry for me. They actually believe that I have spent the week prior frantically making the house presentable and then work my fingers to the bone preparing this huge feast for the entire family. This false perception really works for me. You see, they bring things - food things. Pies and side dishes, appetizers galore. I think they don't realize what the others bring. I swear I do less cooking and get more credit on Thanksgiving than at any other time of the year. I LOVE this racket!

The best part of it is the turkey thing. My Mother always comes over early in the morning to "help me" get the bird into the oven. Don't get me wrong, I actually DO cook it. I make the herb butter and even spread it under the skin. My basting skills rival Emeril. What I do NOT do is stick my hand in the nasty thing to take out the guts, or the giblets or whatever that crap is called. In the words of The Little One, EEeeewww! I always make sure I am busy making something or at least that I LOOK busy when it comes time to *gulp* "wash the bird." It never fails, my Mom will say, "Hon, we really need to get the bird in the oven soon. Why don't I get it washed to save you some time?" I love that woman.

We always invite friends, especially if they do not have family nearby. There have been some years that my living and dining rooms have looked like a restaurant with all the card tables and chairs strewn about. To compensate, my Mother-In-Law began bringing a second turkey a few years ago. It has now become a tradition. This year we're only expecting 12 adults. My Sis-In-Law is bringing a ham to go with the MIL's turkey. Certainly, we don't need another bird. That would be excessive. It has nothing to do with the fact that my Mother informed me that she would be late to the house this year. *Ahem*

My friends, they bought the "overabundance of food" excuse. I am off the hook for another year. And there you have it. I am a Thanksgiving fraud and a sham. Let's keep this just between us, shall we?

(PS - To those of you celebrating this holiday, have a fantastic day! For those of you that do not, have a fantastic day as well! Let us all remember to be thankful for our blessings throughout the year, no matter what day it is.)


Post a Comment

<< Home

Name: Cattiva
Location: Virginia, United States

About Me: I'm the mom of three: #1 Son (20), The Princess of Wails (17) and their baby brother - The Baby (6). I was a grad-student working on an MA in history until we were surprised - I mean blessed - with The Baby. I'll get back to it...someday (the thesis, not the kid - I have no choice concerning the kid). I am one of only a few people I went to school with who is actually using their history degree in my career (and to think my Father called it Basket-weaving!). I live a very hectic life amongst massive clutter. I call it a good day if we have managed to get home at night without losing one of the kids (no matter how hard I try!). Friends say I have a humorous take on life's happenings. The sad part is that what I write about is true. I laugh to keep from crying.

See my complete profile

Best of Blogs 


 Subscribe in a reader

This Day in History

eXTReMe Tracker