Thursday, May 26, 2005

IF Only

#1 Son got his braces today. This is the final step of a three-part treatment to straighten his teeth. Part one was something called a Herpst (sp?) Appliance. This little gem moved his bottom jaw forward to align with the top. You see he inherited an overbite from his father. Lucky him. His father, my ex, didn't have his fixed when he was young so he had the pleasure of having his jaw broken surgically, then wired shut for 6 weeks at the age of 18. I can only imagine the blissful quiet his mother got to experience. The appliance, as you can guess, was very pricey. It also made the kid resemble the Terminator for a year.

Part two of our orthodontic odyssey involved the extraction of several teeth. It was only after this fun and games that we learned we had maxed out his lifetime orthodontics insurance benefit. Each of those teeth was paid for out of pocket (as was the majority of the Herpst). #1 was rather amazed that we actually have to pay money to torture him.

So today, we moved on to the third and final step. As I was adding up the numbers in my head, I developed a list. Here are a few things we could have spent the "teeth money" on, IF ONLY my kid had been born with straight teeth:

A Caribbean cruise for all four of us...for 10 days

A first class European vacation for just C. and I

A reliable older used car

A killer new deck in the back yard (complete with the koi pond that C. covets)

New windows for the upstairs…the fancy kind

A new camper to "see the country"

The list could go on, but I decided to stop. We are not accustomed to all that luxury. #1 Son's teeth have saved us from ourselves. I made a promise to him though. If he does something stupid in the future to ruin his new perfect smile, he will have to pay me back every dime...with interest.


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Name: Cattiva
Location: Virginia, United States

About Me: I'm the mom of three: #1 Son (20), The Princess of Wails (17) and their baby brother - The Baby (6). I was a grad-student working on an MA in history until we were surprised - I mean blessed - with The Baby. I'll get back to it...someday (the thesis, not the kid - I have no choice concerning the kid). I am one of only a few people I went to school with who is actually using their history degree in my career (and to think my Father called it Basket-weaving!). I live a very hectic life amongst massive clutter. I call it a good day if we have managed to get home at night without losing one of the kids (no matter how hard I try!). Friends say I have a humorous take on life's happenings. The sad part is that what I write about is true. I laugh to keep from crying.

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